Scene One
The DUKE's Lodgings in Alcalá de Henares
Enter the DUKE, Don JUAN, and BELTRÁN, all brightly dressed
DUKE: How did you like the bullfights? JUAN: Watch- ing them without you there made me A little restless and skittery. How did you like the tennis match? A bullfight's too uneven a test For me. DUKE: I thought the players played A bit too much to the crowd. It made Me bored, so I lost interest-- Along with my bet. JUAN: And so you missed The fun, the money, and the bulls. BELTRÁN: Have they got any brains, do you think, these fools Who hate to relax and who insist On chasing a little horsehide and hair (That people call a ball) with such Seriousness and sweat? How much Better it is to sit in a chair And watch vicariously those arms And legs flailing about. If the hide Were filled with wine, then, surely I'd Appreciate the obvious charms Of wearing oneself completely out In pursuit of it, but to waste one's strength Chasing the thing the breadth and length Of the court, and grunting and limping about On a broken leg, a poor player Fretting and watching and wincing in pain Each time it bounces back again, When all it is, is a skin full of air! JUAN: Yes, but your arm never feels so good, As when you nail a passing shot. BELTRÁN: Seneca wrote somewhere, did he not, That the ball should really be understood As a stand-in for a pompous ass-- Which doubtless explains, this comparison, The game's appeal; for what's more fun Than smashing some windbag full of gas? And here's another thing: compare The joy of a tennis player to A hunter's--who lets his falcon do The dirty work to some crow in mid-air-- What pleasure is there in watching a chase That's over in a second, and The prey--if you ever get it in hand-- Not worth the keeping? Yet he'll race His horses so fast, you'll swear it true Their flying hooves never touch the grass! God save me from such hunters! Alas, What did the poor little crow ever do? DUKE: You know, you could say much the same thing About war--it's the same analogy-- The planning and the strategy, The attack, the chase, the capturing-- It's just a pleasant form of play. BELTRÁN: A thousand to one against a crow? You're right--that's the way it is, you know, With these scrimmages they fight today. JUAN: Why you're a satirist! BELTRÁN: My lord, What man with any brains at all Is not somewhat satirical? JUAN: Live by the sword, die by the sword. BELTRÁN: There's a critics circle back in Madrid So nasty they'd unleash their scorn On the very father of whom they were born; I found myself right in the mid- dle once. They'd form a ring and when Anyone left, all those who stayed Behind immediately said Worse things of him--those vicious men!-- Than he had said before. I was on To them--and dreaded every tongue-- So what did I do? I simply hung Around till the very last man was gone. Well, I'm afraid my strategy Failed me--it seems they were wandering Off to reform a second ring For the sole purpose of attacking me! A man who has an analytic Mind--if he saw the risk he ran-- He'd pluck an eye out sooner than He'd let himself become a critic! JUAN: Is that really how bad it is? BELTRÁN: A critic's word is worth at least A hundred sermons from a priest. I'm surprised you're not aware of this! I once knew a man who in spite of Lent, And sermons, and very good advice From friends who were both old and wise, Could never manage to repent And change his ways--not for a very Long time--and then one day he heard A critic say one nasty word-- He's now in a trappist monastery! DUKE: I say, this servant you've got's no fool! Rather amusing fella, Don Juan! JUAN: Oh yes, he's quite the wit--is Beltrán-- And spent a couple of years in school. DUKE: What's up with Doña Ana, my friend? JUAN: Tonight she leaves for Madrid, no doubt. DUKE: Let's get our little plan worked out. JUAN: She'll take her own coach back, and send Her people in a hired one. DUKE: That's good for us. JUAN: I hope it is. DUKE: And her driver, is he in on this? JUAN: Oh yes, señor--that deal's been done. DUKE: And is she still at the bullfights, then? JUAN: I didn't see her, but I know That every time she used to go She never sat in the stands or has been In one of the window seats. For she Likes not to be known; she doesn't forget, In the midst of a feast, to pay the debt She owes her family's dignity. DUKE: How many fights did you stay for? JUAN: Just three--and then Don Mendo, astride A pure white stallion, rode inside, And nobody cared for the fights any more. He stole away their collective breath In a livery so green and bright That even the bull at the end of the fight Paid him the homage of his death. DUKE: He's that impressive--this Guzmán? JUAN: Don Mendo's a man who's excellent At everything. DUKE: (And how different Aside The way he talks of you, Don Juan!) I'm a little tired. JUAN: Then take a nap, And in the interim, señor, The Night will spread her mantle for A cloak to hide our little trap. DUKE: You'll wake me when it's time to go? Now that's an order! JUAN: I'll take care.
The DUKE goes out
BELTRÁN: Um--sir--in your little story there, You forgot the picadors, you know, And the passes and the bull. You put those in, Along with a bald-headed joke or two, You've got yourself a play, and you Could make a decent living in The theatre--I'm sure they'd pay At least six hundred for every one. JUAN: All right--suppose that I have done What you suggest--for my first play-- What do I say in the second one? A playwright can't afford to just Repeat himself; the next play must Be fresh. That's how success is won. BELTRÁN: When you serve the same dishes, you've got to disguise 'em So here's what you do--you say the sun Bakes the bald heads in the earlier one, And in the later one, it fries 'em. But seriously, señor, Let's both get back to our conversation; Won't you give me some explanation Of what these fantasies are for? And what are these things all about-- These two big ugly cloaks--and her Coachman--what's he involved in, sir? JUAN: Just listen, and maybe you'll find out. Ever since that joyous night Which celebrates the Great Forerun- ner of Christ the Lord, and hails the bright Uprising of Salvation's Sun-- That night Don Mendo squabbled with me About the Lady Ana, because Where I saw a thousand graces, he Professed to see a thousand flaws-- Since then, the Duke has felt arise Within his heart an absolute Determination to make his eyes The arbiter of our dispute. The Duke explained to Mendo this Idea, and asked him if he were Agreeable to serve him as his Ally, to catch a glimpse of her. Mendo begged off, and anxiously Tried to persuade the Duke away From this--either for jealousy Or fear that I might win the day. That only made the yearning of The young Duke grow. He made this scheme-- Suspicious now of Mendo's love For Doña Ana--his constant theme. The Duke told me of his intent, And I agreed to help him out, Full of hope and confident, Where Mendo had found fear and doubt. Since Doña Ana was here at St. James, On her novena the last few nights, We went to the bullring for the games, More to see her than to watch the fights. And since I knew that she would leave Tonight--sweet mistress of my being-- All Alcalá begins to grieve, And weeping craves the joy of seeing More of your face, and hearing you Express your wit--which all extoll As your greatest grace--for the soul of beau- ty is the beauty of the soul-- We both decided we would try To go along as drivers--seated On her coach, like Phaëtons of the sky-- As bold, though not quite so conceited. And that alone is the extent Of our agreement with the folks Who drive her coach--and our intent In wearing these big ugly cloaks. Because of the lady's modesty I felt obliged to use this plan, And the young Duke's curiosity, And--yes--my own desires, Beltrán. BELTRÁN: Yes--most of that is pretty clear. That last part I'm not certain of: Just what is your advantage here In helping the Duke to fall in love? JUAN: As long as Mendo had no real Competition for her love, Her love for him was strong as steel; I never found a method of Altering that. The Duke's the kind Of man whose strength and whose appeal Could make the lady change her mind. I'll try to help him out, so he'll Succeed with her. For then love's course is Changed, and she's pulled in two directions; And caught between opposing forces, She's vulnerable to my affections. BELTRÁN: Why, that's the trick taught by that fen- cing master Don Luis--who wrote, "The sword is at its weakest when It's moving!" That's a direct quote. JUAN: For then, it's easiest to subdue-- You see what a wonderful lesson that is? BELTRÁN: But tell me, sir, and tell me true-- Are you really going through with this? Aren't you the one who said to me, "If I don't win her with this try, However alive my hopes may be," (I quote) "I'll let my efforts die." JUAN: My love is like Antaeus, Son Of the Earth! Each time he was subdued And thrown upon the ground, thereon He found his life and strength renewed. BELTRÁN: I thought you'd given up forever, And hoped to cure it by letting it die. Because although your plan is clever, I fear in the end it'll go awry. The duke is far above your station-- He'll win her sure. JUAN: That may well be. At least I'll have this consolation, It was a Duke that bested me. If not, there's comfort still in that-- To know that what I couldn't do, A Duke was also a failure at! BELTRÁN: With comfort like that, you've managed to Cut off your own hopes totally! Don't you see, sir, all you've done, Is trade a doubtful misery For an absolutely certain one? You hope that Ana will desert Don Mendo for the Duke, you're sure That by exchanging hurt for hurt, You've found yourself a remedy. An epigram that Martial wrote On Fannius is a perfect fit. JUAN: What did he say? BELTRÁN: Well, I won't quote The Latin, but I'll translate it: "Fannius, while running away From his foes, committed suicide. Now that was crazy, wouldn't you say? To save himself from death, he died!" JUAN: A very witty epigram-- But what does it have to do with me? You're much more certain than I am That the Duke will win the victory. In the Court of Spain, he's a powerful man; But Mendo is the object of The lady's passion--a fact that can Make him as great in the Court of Love. BELTRÁN: They're both great rivals, I admit; And you, sir, are a little. . . less. But still, if Fortune favors it, I think you can achieve success. There once were two great highwaymen Who squabbled over what they stole, Neither would take a portion, when Each thought that he deserved the whole. And while they squabbled there came by A ratty little sneak, and he Snatched all the booty. JUAN: God grant that I May have that kind of victory.
They go out
Scene Two
Alcalá. A gallery in the house where Doña ANA is lodged.
Enter Doña ANA and Doña LUCRECIA, passing through
ANA: How were the bullfights--did you have fun? LUCRECIA: When one's heart aches so painfully, One finds the usual remedy Of little benefit to one. For such a frantic worrying Touches my soul so very near, That though I watched the bullfights, dear, I never really saw a thing. ANA: I'll bet there's love involved in this! LUCRECIA: Nothing I do can increase my pain, And so I might as well explain Just what my cause of suffering is. Twelve months of light Lord Phoebus gave Unto his sister Moon, since I, Sweet cousin Ana, infected by Love's dart, became Boy Cupid's slave. He won no easy victory, This man I love--for he was made To pay the most that could be paid For the least sign of love from me. Till now I haven't told you this, For any woman who needlessly Reveals a love affair--why, she But shows the world how loose she is. But now my love trembles to think My silence may do an injury; For passion is a dangerous sea, In which one's honor is sure to sink. It is Don Mendo, then, who is The cause of my too fatal love-- No lesser love could be guilty of So ruthless an effect as this! He used to stare at you, I know, At your unrivaled loveliness; Only such beauty as you possess Could make him to forget me so. To soothe my jealousy, he tried To absolve himself of any blame, And though he dampened down the flame, A little spark was left inside. I knew that he and all his witty Friends and their servants were coming here-- For whose sake, do you think, my dear, Since I was staying in the city? I asked my father for permission To come to Alcalá today, He gave me leave to go away, Since you were here--on that condition. But it's not for the bullfights that I went, It's to shield us both from injury-- You from his further lies, and me From further disillusionment. And here I offer proof of these Truths I have said; look at this letter, And in it you will find still better Evidence of his treacheries. Here--satisfy your jealousy With proof of what I tell you now-- See how he speaks of you, and how He acts when he is with you. See!
She gives a letter to Doña ANA who reads it
ANA: "You but increase your agony When you refuse to hear me plead. If you find fault where there's no need, You needs must suffer equally. If your own worth you could but see, Then would you see how violence Has clouded your intelligence, How in your madness you strike out, Wronging your beauty with your doubt, And with your jealousy, your sense. "Between Lucrecia and Doña Ana Who knows not the difference? It is the day's pre-eminence To night. Or life's to death. What, can a Star be mistaken for Diana, Chaste Goddess of the Moon? No fur- ther be my unjust slanderer, And calm your fears--for I have eyes, And a soul as well, to recognize Which lady is the lovelier." LUCRECIA: What do you say about this note? ANA: What do you want me to say, my dear? You know what he says of me in here-- Since you've already read what he wrote. This letter is the antidote To the poison of your jealousy. How I am treated surely you see-- You know for certain now what's true-- Love is the source of his praise for you, And hate, of his cruelty to me. But you must be tired, I would guess-- Come in, and rest a bit if you can. We can talk about that wretched man Of yours on the road. LUCRECIA: Well, thank you, yes-- My jealousy and my distress Have hardly let me sleep. ANA: You know, At twelve o'clock we have to go. LUCRECIA: Are you going to rest a moment, too? ANA: There's a thousand things I have to do Before we leave, Lucrecia--so, no. LUCRECIA: Can I be of help? ANA: Just leave me be-- If you want to help that's the only way. LUCRECIA: If you put it like that, I have to obey.
ANA: (Just like you had to murder me! Aside Celia! Come here--immediately--
CELIA comes in
And lend your voice to my lament-- For in my cruel predicament One breath is far too weak to sustain, One mouth too tiny to contain The passionate cries that I must vent! CELIA: What happened? ANA: Another injury--- That's all--from that disgusting Men- do, who now confirms with his own pen What his own lips have said of me. CELIA: Sometimes the wisest course can be To admit your mistake and change your mind. Your eyes and ears have helped you find The danger--just when you needed to! At this point, there's no loss for you-- Be grateful you're no longer blind! A man who's sweet when you're nearby And badmouths you when you're away Is either so wanton that he will say Anything--or else his love's a lie! When a man like that says that he'll try To keep his promise and marry you-- Men talk like that when they come to woo-- But it's neither likely nor necessary, Since men like him don't tend to marry-- When he repents, what will he do? ANA: O Celia, my poor heart is not An angel in its apprehension, Of instant grasp and full retention, That never loses a single thought. Nor is my heart a thing that's wrought Of bronze, in which remain fore'er The images ensculpted there. My love can change--and if that can be, What better opportunity For it can we find anywhere? Don't think that monstrous love that he Enslaved me with could now survive As strong, as whole, and as alive In me as it was initially. Since the night I heard him slander me, I've spent the time--day in, day out-- Remembering all he talked about, The whole insulting little scene; And who would win the war between My love and hurt was still in doubt. But now this latest injury Has hit me like a powerful flood, And love has given up for good, Surrending to revenge in me. CELIA: You're sure you've changed now--permanently? ANA: If not, let Heaven increase my woe! CELIA: But Heaven makes your fortunes grow-- And you make me so happy, too, By seeing at last that he's not for you-- The foul-mouthed wretch!--and letting him go. He once called me a witch because When he was staring up at you, I closed the shutters. He never knew I heard him. Well, whatever my flaws, I wouldn't love him even if he was The very last male living on This earth! ANA: You think you're put upon! He called my tray of blushes and bases The ship that launched a thousand faces. CELIA: How totally different is this Don Juan! When you're cool to him or discourteous, He responds by being positive; But no matter what lavish praise you give That poisonous snake--he's scurrilous! One time I heard Don Juan speak thus To himself, asking quite desperately, "Is it a sin for me to be In love with you? O heartless beast! Please God-- But no, God is not pleased-- Since I love you more than I love me!" If you had seen the courtesy With which he spoke to me that day He asked to be allowed to pay A visit--and the humility! Or seen how he defended me Before his man, although I had Discouraged him! He didn't get mad; Each time he was rebuffed, he tried Again, and when he was denied, How crestfallen he was--how sad! If you had seen-- But what can you Have seen to equal what you heard When he disputed every word That traitor said, and spoke you true! You could have melted into a dew, Though you were made of flinty rock. ANA: And what gives you the right to mock My taste in men? Are you so smart? CELIA: I have a soft spot in my heart For men who praise me when they talk. But apart from that, I have to do What I think reasonable and right. ANA: If only the man weren't such a fright! If his face and figure were straight and true! CELIA: So what? A clever woman like you Can learn to remedy that kind Of thing. In men, where do you find Their real loveliness and grace? They're in the heart, not in the face; Not in the figure, but in the mind. When the outside's fair--like a treasure chest-- Inside, the brains are dull as lead. There's precious little in a young man's head; They're jackasses dipped in gold--at best. The gaudiest house is the emptiest. Now here's a truth--though outward grace First catches the eye, that soon gives place To habit. Our taste for beauty wears out, And we grow to care much less about Having a sweet or sour face. ANA: I don't deny that since that night I heard Don Juan defending me, I've thought of him more pleasantly Than I did before. It's only right A natural obligation might Result from his benevolence. And since a cruel indifference No longer hardens my poor heart, Perhaps a better love could start Where a bad one once took residence. It won't be easy to forget A love I've grown accustomed to-- Although my heart is now recu- perating from the attack it met. One image, rooted out, may let Another image find the space To grow. For once I start to erase Don Mendo from my memory, Then time, as you have promised me, Will help Don Juan to take his place. CELIA: May I see the letter that he wrote? ANA: Go fetch a lamp, for the dark of night Will keep you from having a proper sight Of the wrongs he does me in this note.
CELIA goes in for a moment to give the order, then returns. A Page enters with lamps
CELIA: Here are the lamps. ANA: Here is the letter. CELIA: Also, I had a request from two Of the drivers, to come and talk with you. ANA: Then show them in. CELIA: Come in.
Don JUAN and the DUKE come in, wrapped in cloaks
JUAN: (It's better Aside If I keep quiet, for if I spoke, She'd know me. But you, she's never seen-- It's safe for you to talk. I'll screen Myself in the shadows of my cloak. DUKE: The heavens guard you and keep you in grace! ANA: Welcome. DUKE: Your coachman sent us here; He can't come in today, I fear; So we're to serve you in his place. He's down with a terrible illness, ma'am. What time would you like us to arrive? He isn't able to make the drive Today, señora, but I am. ANA: How sick is he? DUKE: Enough that he must Stay home for the day, at least. ANA: I'm sorry To hear that. DUKE: Señora, not to worry-- I'm a person no less worthy of trust. ANA: At midnight, then, the coach should be here Ready and waiting outside the door. DUKE: That's something no one's seen before-- Sunrise at midnight--when you appear! ANA: What do you mean? DUKE I mean what I meant. ANA: Are you smitten with me? DUKE: Is there anything Illegal in that? Though I'm no king I have a soul--and though I've spent My life in this profession, I've not Escaped love's pains--and but for those I swear, señora, I would lose This cloak and cover without a thought! ANA: Is that so? Is this the mask you wear When you court some girl you're trying to woo? DUKE: Could be. ANA: Well, what's the world coming to? (This driver's in good spirits, I swear.) Aside CELIA: Don Mendo's coming. ANA: I'll look for you At midnight then. Good-bye--godspeed. DUKE: But for my comrade's sake I need To do some other business, too. It's his coach that's going to take Your people. Now you already know How much that costs--and still there's no Agreement yet. We hoped to make A deal before we end this visit-- You're not offended, God forbid! ANA: Just get me safely to Madrid-- It's not worth haggling over, is it? DUKE: As long as we reach an agreement, ma'am-- Like one big happy family.
The DUKE and Don JUAN withdraw, but remain eavesdropping behind one door. Don MENDO enters, with LEONARDO
MENDO: Those bullfights went on interminably! I'm back in port--thank God I am!
Aside to Don JUAN
DUKE: I'm going to listen in to see If Doña Ana's still in love With him. JUAN: What's your opinion of The lady? DUKE: One glance has demolished me!
Dona LUCRECIA and ORTIZ appear at another door, and stay there, eavesdropping
LUCRECIA: (O good Heavens--Don Mendo's with her!) Aside ORTIZ: Does he know you're here? LUCRECIA: And soon she'll rue The day! ORTIZ: For this is the day when you Find out how true your jealousies were. Or not. MENDO: My lovely Ana--my dear-- What's this? You do not answer me? What's this? And who so suddenly Has altered my good fortunes here? Señora, how can you be so grim, So unresponsive now to me? Who placed me in such jeopardy? Who spoke me ill? Reveal him-- Or her! What's wrong? ANA: How could I wor- ry about your love, for you "have eyes And a soul as well, to recognize Which lady is the lovelier"? MENDO: (That's from the letter that I sent Aside To keep Lucrecia from finding out!) I know what this is all about-- That fool Lucrecia is so intent On winning me, she'll slander me To do it! What is she thinking of? Come back with me to the court, my love; I'll show her just how wrong she can be! LUCRECIA: (The wretch!) Aside MENDO: I have so little regard For Lucrecia's favor, all it would take Is a single word from you to make Me end it--though she might take it hard. ANA: One word? from a lady who, when "she tries To mouthe her mediocre wit, The barren emptiness of it Freezes her very breath to ice"? MENDO: (Don Juan must have told her about that night, Aside And the whole story of our little brawl; And now it going to take me all The wit I have to set things right. If I confess the truth, I fear The Duke with all his power and love-- She is a woman--will rob me of My hopes, and leave me with nothing here.) Face me, that I may see the true Heaven of love that's captured there. ANA: Really, Don Mendo, would that repair A face that's "ugly at closer view"? MENDO: I see that eyesore named Don Juan De Mendoza has told you everything-- How he and I were quarreling Back on the Vigil of St. John. And his very words I recognize-- When that idiot spoke of you that way; Because I defended you that day-- I praised your beauty to the skies! JUAN: (You traitor!) Aside
DUKE: Calm down, and don't let on! MENDO: But it would have been better for him to say Nothing, for then it's possible that I may Have forgiven the folly of Don Juan. But now that you have reason to Be angry with me--as it turns out-- Because I spared the life of a lout Who dared so to revile you, Don't blame me, for the presence of The Duke Urbino made me restrain Myself, and forced me to contain The burning fury of my love.
CELIA and Doña Ana speak aside
CELIA: (What an imposter!) ANA: (What a cheat!) CELIA: (And this is the man you were going to wed!) MENDO: If for this you think I've forfeited Your heavenly beauty, that face so sweet, Return with me, and you shall view How that vile tongue is silenced and Cut off at once with my own hand. ANA: Then you should protect yourself--from you. MENDO: Myself from me? Then you think I Have offended you? ANA: O I think so-- Who else could it be? MENDO: I just don't know How it could be that this rotten ly- ing, all-toadying imbecile, Under the guise of telling you true, Convinced you, just to flatter you, That he spoke well and I spoke ill! But shortly will you see with those Dear eyes of yours, my mistress fair, How I shall punish that villain there. ANA: "Between the two of us, I suppose He's a good man, and if I contend He's just a little short--of wit, It does no harm to mention it; He is your kinsman and my friend." DUKE: I only said this to the Duke In private, who was quite amazed To hear a woman I just praised So slandered in Don Juan's rebuke. ANA: He said it was the opposite. MENDO: He said? Ah-ha! So now I see Who it must have been that slandered me-- It was the Duke--no doubt of it! He hasn't even been to court, And he's up to his ears in treachery Already? What, does he think that he Is in his village? He's not so import- ant here! He can't depend upon His title and birth with me--and that Is what I'll teach the little brat! DUKE: (You traitor!) Aside
To the DUKE
JUAN: Calm down--and don't let on. ANA: What good are all these lame excuses, These fabrications and these flights Of fancy--when the simple truth Alone your filthy tongue indicts? It didn't bother you at all To speak of me so maliciously, And now you're bothered that someone else Reported your insults back to me? What's hurting you is just the truth Of your own faults--which stick to you. If you have sinned, and I found out, What does it matter how I knew? No one told me what you said Of me that night--and that's the truth, So help me God--or let me die Cruelly cut off in the bloom of youth. And since it's true, surely you know What you just heard--and you heard me right-- Were the very same words and sentences You said of me on St. John's Night. And since I know, perhaps you ought To give up hope--and dry your tears-- And as a rule, keep a civil tongue In your head--for even the walls have ears.
ANA goes out
MENDO: Come back, sweet mistress, hear me out! My faith will answer your unbelief; And since even the walls have ears Use yours to hear my cry of grief. LUCRECIA: (I'd sooner see you die of grief!) Aside
Dona LUCRECIA and ORTIZ go out
CELIA: (I hope it takes a thousand years!) Aside
The DUKE and Don JUAN speak aside
DUKE: (But where can she have heard the things We said that night--for it appears She knows them all?) JUAN: (I didn't tell her.) DUKE: (Neither did I.) JUAN: (The walls have ears.)
The DUKE and Don JUAN go out
MENDO: Hear me, Celia, as you hope to enjoy The prime of your still blooming years. CELIA: Before, I was dried up like a witch-- And now I'm a blooming, it appears. MENDO: Who ever said I called you a witch, Celia? CELIA: Don Mendo--the walls have ears.
CELIA goes out
MENDO: What's this--is Fortune now my foe? Can circumstances so unsure Truly effect such a total change In a heart where I felt so secure? This from a heart which freely gave The dearest favors it held to me-- Now soft as wax to receive my charge, But hard as bronze to reject my plea. To rivals now do you give ear, Give vicious gossips audience, And yet refuse to hear my voice, And hide from me your countenance? LEONARDO: You can't debate with passion, sir. Is it possible that you're not aware That reactions that extravagant Need a bigger cause than you gave her there? It's not for the faults she talked about, That there's been a change of love in her; Before she ever made the change, She already knew what your faults were. If all the distress that you just saw Were caused by the insults she heard about, She wouldn't have been so resolute In refusing even to hear you out. Suppose the faults of someone you love Are troubling you, what's your reaction? When you start bringing up their faults, What you're looking for is satisfaction. Now Ana wouldn't listen to you, So I'm surprised you're not aware That she needs your faults, since she's trying to Avoid any satisfaction there. And people who go looking for faults, Are really hiding their true intent; They need an excuse, and so they use Your errors and their punishment. MENDO: I think you've figured it out. LEONARDO: Señor, I'm afraid you're blind--you never knew How little she cared while she was gone, Or how her delay was deceiving you. Delay a marriage in order to make A novena? You were the victim of A ruse. No woman would prefer Making novenas to making love. Her double-dealing was secretly Pursuing quite a different goal; As long as she hadn't reached it yet, She kept your love under her control. But now she's got it, she's dumping you, And hearing no arguments on your part; She needs your faults to justify Her totally unjust change of heart. MENDO: That's a very sharp analysis-- But by every star that shines so bright, I swear I'll take revenge on her For the cruelty she showed tonight. LEONARDO: You have the power to do your will. MENDO: Two men just left here, did you see? LEONARDO: They're Doña Ana's drivers, sir. MENDO: Then Fortune's still assisting me!
The DUKE and Don JUAN enter, still as coachmen
DUKE: I never saw a lovelier, Nor heard a woman of better wit. JUAN: So Mendo will get the worst of it? DUKE: You'll have to ask that question of her. Heavens! I'm mad to love her so! JUAN: (My plan is working perfectly!) Aside DUKE: She'll be my wife! JUAN: Your wife? DUKE: She'll be! JUAN: (Not too fast now--and not too slow!) Aside MENDO: The Lord protect you, gentlemen. DUKE: And who comes here? MENDO: Don Mendo de Guzmán. DUKE: (Don Juan, what do you say Aside We punish him right here?) JUAN: (Not when Aside We're right by Doña Ana's door.) DUKE: What can we do for you, dear sir? MENDO: Since you're the ones who are driving her, Tell me what hour she's chosen for Her departure. DUKE: It's at midnight, sir. MENDO: Well then, there's something you could do That would make me very grateful to you. DUKE: Say it. MENDO: Could you arrange for her Carriage to fall behind, and keep A ways apart. You two could say In your defense you lost your way In the dark, or that you fell asleep. DUKE: What for? MENDO: I only want to say A word to her, my friends, in pri- vate, and without a witness by. DUKE: And if someone tries to make us pay For what we've done? MENDO: You need not fear, With my support, a reprimand; This chain I'm holding in my hand Will make what I owe you very clear, And both of you will be let go. DUKE: I think not, sir. MENDO: But you have to!
MENDO gives a chain to the DUKE
DUKE: Then there's one thing you have to do If you want us to serve you so. MENDO: Then tell me. DUKE: On this foray, it'll be Just you and that friend of yours who'll go; For every witness, as you know, Is a potential enemy. MENDO: All right, I give you my solemn word-- We'll go alone then, just we two. DUKE: Then we will be of service to you. MENDO: And I'll be right behind you. DUKE Lord! Look at the hour--it's time to leave!
Don JUAN and the DUKE speak aside
JUAN: (My lord, what's you intent in this?) DUKE: (Quite soon, Don Juan, you'll see what it is.)
The DUKE goes out, followed by Don JUAN
MENDO: Then, Leonardo, tell them we've Got need of a couple of real race- horses to run this wild beast To ground. Today's the day we feast On the sweetest spoils of the chase. LEONARDO: And there's no room for any doubt-- Not with the driver supporting you. MENDO: That goes to show what money can do. LEONARDO: Yes, but when he helps you out, He doesn't do what his lady pleases. MENDO: He won't be the first one to betray His mistress like that. What he does today Is just what Judas did to Jesus.
They go out
Scene Three
A field next to the highway from Alcalá to Madrid, about a quarter of a league from the city
Four MULETEERS and a WOMAN enter singing
1 MULETEER: "On a beautiful location There sits old Viveros Inn Where the keeper's a good Christian, And the wine's as strong as sin. What a lovely place it's in! Though the keeper's a good Christian, Still the wine is strong as sin!" 2 MULETEER: "With my donkey and my saddle I don't envy any bloke, 'Cause a donkey and a saddle's Like a coach to one's who's broke." WOMAN: "Oh I love to watch the bullfights And I go to see them fight, And there's not a single moment I don't keep them in my sight." 3 MULETEER: "I've got eyes I'm very fond of And I keep them in my pack; Did you never see a fella With his eyes upon his back?" 4 MULETEER: Was that a song, or a growl or a yell? 3 MULETEER: I use it to scare my troubles away. 4 MULETEER: I see--so we're your troubles today? 'Cause you're scarin' us away as well. Shut it--and take the advice I give: Or you'll frighten the mules all the way to Madrid. 3 MULETEER: You came to see the bulls? I did. 4 MULETEER: They don't have mirrors where you live? 2 MULETEER: Hey, look at that coach! They're not goin' right. Where do they think they're headin' for? 1 MULETEER: The driver must be takin' a snore-- Or maybe they're just campin' out for the night. 2 MULETEER: The king of coachman! Where'd they find 'im? He's completely lost. He's headin' this way. 1 MULETEER: Yeah, he's takin' a shortcut through the hay! 2 MULETEER: With two guys on horseback right behind 'im. 1 MULETEER: They're leaving some scandal behind--that's why People come out to the desert to stay. 2 MULETEER: I doubt they're coming here to pray, I don't see a hermitage nearby. 1 MULETEER: Gee-yup, you pagan mule! Hoo-oo! This beast is makin' fun of me! Francisco, smack 'er! 2 MULETEER: Git! Hee-ee! 1 MULETEER: Gee-yup! What the devil's wrong with you!
They leave. From within come more voices
MENDO: Coachman, stand to! Ho! ANA: Who are you? MENDO: I am Don Mendo. ANA: Keep going! MENDO: Ho!
Don MENDO, Doña ANA, Doña LUCRECIA, and LEONARDO enter
ANA: Who else would ever dare to show Such insolence to me--but you? MENDO: If I'm too bold or free--my defense is That your own inconstancy's to blame! ANA: My just revenge--that's its true name-- And wisely coming to my senses! MENDO: Who did this to me? ANA: Your treacheries! MENDO: Deceiver! Do you think to make Me a fool? Must my offenses take The blame, and excuse your cruelties? You won't accomplish your intent!
Don MENDO starts to struggle with Doña ANA; Doña LUCRECIA starts to help her, and LEONARDO to restrain Doña LUCRECIA
ANA: What are you doing? MENDO: I'm punishing you For your inconstancy! ANA: And do You dare be so rude and impudent? LUCRECIA: Justice, O God! LEONARDO: And you hold still! ANA: This is outrageous! This is too much! MENDO: In spite of all your lies and such, I will have my desires--I will!
The DUKE and Don JUAN, as coachmen, enter and draw their swords on Don MENDO and LEONARDO, who then let go of Doña ANA and Doña LUCRECIA
DUKE: (Vengeance is calling--let us be bold!) To Don JUAN ANA: Where are my pages? Where can they be? My coachmen have played false with me! DUKE: We are your coachmen, and here we hold Our lives, senora, but as your pawn. MENDO: I am Don Mendo! How dare you approach Me thus, you wretches! LEONARDO: Get back to the coach! This is Don Mendo de Guzmán! What are you doing? Are you so bold!
Don MENDO and LEONARDO draw their swords. They fight
MENDO: (They fight like furies from the fiery abyss!) Aside LUCRECIA: What a disaster! ANA: What a mess this is!
Don MENDO and LEONARDO retire, the DUKE and Don JUAN go after them
Coachmen! Coachmen, hold! Hold!
The women go off


The Walls Have Ears, Act III

Electronic text by Vern G. Williamsen and J T Abraham
Additional formatting by Matthew D. Stroud

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Association for Hispanic Classical Theater, Inc.

Most recent update: 28 Jun 2002